WARNING, DO NOT BRING AK-47 LOOK A LIKE UMBRELLAS TO MALLS. No wait, its just a plain, black umbrella.

                                                   Are we really that dumb?
boston.com
BURLINGTON — In retrospect, the young man probably wishes he had just worn his rain jacket. As it was, he set out against the weather with an umbrella, a choice that in another time probably would have passed without consequence.  But in the age of the orange alert, when airport public announcement systems and news reports sound a thrum of warnings about dangers in our midst, the umbrella protruding from his backpack during a visit to the Burlington Mall yesterday looked, to some people, like a gun.  After two employees reported a man with what seemed to be a short rifle ducking into a Nordstrom restroom, some 40 police descended on the scene, ushered out alarmed customers, and blockaded the mall as shopkeepers locked themselves into their stores and traffic on the roadways outside piled up in all directions.  With helicopters whirring overhead and SWAT teams securing the premises, the umbrella-toting man, oblivious that the furor had anything to do with him, returned to his job at Lahey Clinic nearby....Minutes later, a phalanx of SWAT team members in shields and body armor marched through the mall....The scare began just before 10 a.m., when mall security alerted police that two employees had seen a man with a backpack and a short rifle walk into the building and go into the bathroom.  About 40 officers raced to the scene, blocking off the parking lot and evacuating shoppers as worried workers locked themselves into stores.   Kent said the response was appropriate, given the reports, and added that some officers had been training at Burlington High School for the threat of mass shootings when the reports came in...State Police spokesman David Procopio said that the umbrella looked like a rifle when it was protruding from the man’s backpack and that the mistake was “easy to make.’’

This is today's sign that our society is completely fucked.  Forget the obesity crisis, forget our governments inability to do anything productive, forget that truth that the quickest way to get famous is make a sex tape and then deny wanting people to see it (ex. Erin Andrews...Paris Hilton...Kim Kardashian).  The geniuses at the Burlington Mall called in the SWAT team, Drug Dogs, and Helicopters because they thought they saw a guy with a gun sticking out of his backpack, but it was actually an umbrella.  Wait what?  


1.  What psycho would put his gun in his backpack, with half the barrel showing?   No one would.  Trench coats were made for a reason.  It does not make any sense.  Would I put, say my umbrella that I use because its raining outside in my backpack....hmm yes, I think I would.
2.  Is it too difficult for say one of the hundreds of employees/Paul Blart Mall Cops to simply ask the guy whats in his backpack before calling in the National Guard?  People need to start using common sense...just ask the guy, BAM, problem solved.
3.  This story was on the Front Page of The Boston Globe.  The Globe is good for one thing, and one thing only, the Sports Section.  But have some self-respect Globe.  This is your #1 story??  There is a reason the Globe almost went out of business.  It's a complete joke...minus the sports section.  
4.  Yes, I will blast this song whenever I am close to the Burlington Mall from now on.