You Know What Really Grinds My Gears?

When your driving on the highway, long trip, so you’re a little on edge because your butt starts to hurt after sitting so long, and you pull off at one of the rest stops to grab some McDonald’s.  Maybe there is a Papa Gino’s in the building too, but you have no choice but eat at the Golden Arches.  Nothing says /smells road trip like a double ¼ pounder with cheese, large fries, and apple pie. 

When you walk in, it’s all business, order your food (using the numbers of course)…Ill have a number 3, super size, with a double shake, swirl it, and a fresh Johnny Appleseed, better make that for the road, with a some hankies on top.   Sound as serious and important as possible.  The good employees at McDonald’s (oxymoron?) will get it, and if they mess your order up, which they obviously will, and give you a baked potato or even worse a salad, then you can complain and get your money back.  It’s a win-win. 

Anyways, the part about these pit stops that really grinds my gears is when your waiting in line, just itching for your burger, and there is a manatee that can’t decide if she/he wants a two or three orders of McNuggets.  Finally, after making the life-altering choice of ordering a large Oreo McFlurry, she/he adds, in a proud tone, “oh and a diet coke. “ WOAH!!  Diet coke?  Are you sure, that might just be a little too healthy for you.  1. You don’t tell the people at McDonald’s what drink you want, you just say, small/medium/large.  You fill it up yourself.  There is no need to announce your monumental choice.  2.  Is a Diet Soda really going to make a difference?  I don’t think those cankles are going to magically disappear now that you wash down a couple of greasy Big Macs with a Diet Coke.  Don’t lie to yourself, your not being healthy either way.  3.  Stop acting like you’re so damn important and courageous for ordering a diet drink.  EVERYONE knows you really want a cherry-coke. 4.  Stop taking forever to choose which McDonald’s item is going to be your explanation to your doctor for why you need a triple-by-pass surgery.  If it’s easier, just say I’ll take 1…of everything.  Then, the rest of the world could get our own food and get out of there.

That’s what grinds my gears.